In message <10hq66eai2kog6a@corp.supernews.com>, "CRWLR" wrote:

>Living in the People's Republic of California has its ups and downs.
>Yesterday was a down, for a while.
>
>The Governor needs to make a yacht payment, so he sent me a vehicle
>registration renewal notice that demands me to make a trip to the local Smog
>Station and support the yachting tastes of those guys. Anyway, they attached
>a host of sensors and probes to my car while making it run a mile or so on a
>treadmill.
>
>The treadmill part of the test seems to have been my undoing. They
>administer this test at two speeds, slow - 15mph - and fast - 25mph. My car
>tripped the Gross Polluter flags and sirens during the low speed run on the
>treadmill, but seemed to make the computers happy - or at least satisfied -
>on the high speed run. The machine spit out a report that detailed the crap
>being spewed from the tail pipe.
>
>The guy administering the test allowed me to take my car out to the freeway
>and get off at the next exit and come back in, where he immediately
>administered the exact same test again, and within minutes of pulling back
>into the repair bay. On the second test, the car passed with flying colors.
>The report that the machine spits out lists the max reading that is allowed,
>and the actual reading that was measured.
>
>Two tests, the first a dismal failure and the second a shining example of
>automotive technology working to keep our skies clean and blue. The ONLY
>difference being a trip around the block, well down the freeway and back to
>the shop. As a Gross Polluter, the NO at low speed tipped the counters at
>1996, whatever that means. The allowable limit is 695 for this category, so
>my car measured roughly 3 times the allowable limit. After the run around
>the block, this number came in at 130. The high speed test allowed 717, and
>I got 587 as a GP, and 140 on the 2nd test. Carbon Monoxide and Hydrocarbons
>are also tested and reported, as a Gross Polluter, these numbers exceeded
>the max allowable by factors of about 3, and when the car passed the numbers
>tiny fractions of the same numbers when the Polluter flag was tripped.
>
>If the car can fail in the low speed test, and pass the high speed test,
>then drive around the block and pass both tests, why don't they do the high
>speed test first so the low speed test has a better chance of passing?
>
>What I learned is that when you take an older car to the Smog ***** for
>yacht payment collections, mine is a '94 with nearly 200,000 miles, maybe
>you should leave it idling in the parking lot before the test is
>administered. I had come in from a 40+ mile commute, but they let the car
>sit for an hour before they got to it, so it cooled off so much that the
>smog stuff was not up to speed during the test.
>


This will happen if the CAT is not up to temp. He may not have allowed it to
warm up before he tested it.

 

> "Fred W." wrote:
> >
> > ...umm, Bill. That test was for a '78 Ford Bronco.
> > You do actually still own and register a Jeep, don't you? Otherwise,
why
> > hang around here?
> >
> > PS - Real Jeeps aren't made by FoMoCo...
> >
> > -Fred W

"L.W. (ßill) ------ III" <----------@***.net> wrote in message
news:411D2C41.62033FA3@***.net...
> http://www.----------.com/CJregistration.jpg How lets see the see
> the smog certificate on your POS.
> God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
> mailto:--------------------
>

Sorry *****. No can-do.
See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
steenkin' smog tests.

-Fred W
'98 TJ Sport

---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

> "Fred W." wrote:
> >
> > ...umm, Bill. That test was for a '78 Ford Bronco.
> > You do actually still own and register a Jeep, don't you? Otherwise,
why
> > hang around here?
> >
> > PS - Real Jeeps aren't made by FoMoCo...
> >
> > -Fred W

"L.W. (ßill) ------ III" <----------@***.net> wrote in message
news:411D2C41.62033FA3@***.net...
> http://www.----------.com/CJregistration.jpg How lets see the see
> the smog certificate on your POS.
> God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
> mailto:--------------------
>

Sorry *****. No can-do.
See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
steenkin' smog tests.

-Fred W
'98 TJ Sport

---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

> "Fred W." wrote:
> >
> > ...umm, Bill. That test was for a '78 Ford Bronco.
> > You do actually still own and register a Jeep, don't you? Otherwise,
why
> > hang around here?
> >
> > PS - Real Jeeps aren't made by FoMoCo...
> >
> > -Fred W

"L.W. (ßill) ------ III" <----------@***.net> wrote in message
news:411D2C41.62033FA3@***.net...
> http://www.----------.com/CJregistration.jpg How lets see the see
> the smog certificate on your POS.
> God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
> mailto:--------------------
>

Sorry *****. No can-do.
See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
steenkin' smog tests.

-Fred W
'98 TJ Sport

---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

> "Fred W." wrote:
> >
> > ...umm, Bill. That test was for a '78 Ford Bronco.
> > You do actually still own and register a Jeep, don't you? Otherwise,
why
> > hang around here?
> >
> > PS - Real Jeeps aren't made by FoMoCo...
> >
> > -Fred W

"L.W. (ßill) ------ III" <----------@***.net> wrote in message
news:411D2C41.62033FA3@***.net...
> http://www.----------.com/CJregistration.jpg How lets see the see
> the smog certificate on your POS.
> God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
> mailto:--------------------
>

Sorry *****. No can-do.
See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
steenkin' smog tests.

-Fred W
'98 TJ Sport

---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

Quit your braggin'.
God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
mailto:-------------------- http://www.----------.com/

"Fred W." wrote:
>
> Sorry *****. No can-do.
> See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
> steenkin' smog tests.
>
> -Fred W
> '98 TJ Sport
>
> ---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

Quit your braggin'.
God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
mailto:-------------------- http://www.----------.com/

"Fred W." wrote:
>
> Sorry *****. No can-do.
> See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
> steenkin' smog tests.
>
> -Fred W
> '98 TJ Sport
>
> ---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

Quit your braggin'.
God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
mailto:-------------------- http://www.----------.com/

"Fred W." wrote:
>
> Sorry *****. No can-do.
> See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
> steenkin' smog tests.
>
> -Fred W
> '98 TJ Sport
>
> ---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

Quit your braggin'.
God Bless America, ßill O|||||||O
mailto:-------------------- http://www.----------.com/

"Fred W." wrote:
>
> Sorry *****. No can-do.
> See, I live up here in "Live Free or Die" state where we don't need no
> steenkin' smog tests.
>
> -Fred W
> '98 TJ Sport
>
> ---yeah, I know, I know... real jeeps don't have coil springs...

 

"wkearney99" <wkearney99@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:JoCdnbnF1Npdh4DcRVn-oQ@speakeasy.net...
> What you should have learned is to get your polluting wreck fixed instead
of
> grousing about it.
>
> At ten years old and that many miles it's clear it needs fixing AND you
drive it
> too much.

Maybe he should buy an environmentally-friendly car such as the Hummer that
"Mr. Environment" Shwartznegger drives.