Question: You are driving in a car at a constant speed. On your left side is a drop-off, and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping horse, which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is a galloping zebra. Both the horse and zebra are also traveling at the same speed as you. What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?
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Answer: Get your drunk-butt off the merry-go-round!

 

A blond is trying to explain how she wrecked the car. "I swerved around a tree, another tree, another tree, another tree and another tree. Then I skidded into the wall and totalled the car."

"Where did this happen?" Asked the husband.

"On the freeway." She replied.

"There's no trees on the freeway," he said. "You're swerving around your air freshener!"